


Existence

by KittyGamer



Series: Those in Control [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Needs A Hug, Family, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, References to Depression, Step-parents, Step-siblings, maybe depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-21
Updated: 2019-05-21
Packaged: 2020-03-08 20:27:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18902053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittyGamer/pseuds/KittyGamer
Summary: You take a few quick gulps of a morning drink, a replacement to eating breakfast, and realized you should probably drink some water. You can’t recall the last time you had drank some.A different realization dawns on you.Did that really just happen?You had just saw Sans.Had talked to him.Chara too.How was that even possible?They were from the game Undertale.You weren’t.





	Existence

**Author's Note:**

> If you think more tags should be added feel free to tell me!
> 
> This is a short story that came to me one day so I wrote it out. I wanted to add so much more but, I feel this was an ok length. Not the best but I feel it works.  
> Hope you enjoy this little story.

Someone is speaking, yet you aren’t listing. Your focus is on your phone. The dimly lit screen is filled with words. A story. A story filled with pain, suffering, you don’t even know if it will end with happiness and understanding. You hope it does, that's the only thing you really hope for. Well, that and the other bunch of stories your reading. You love the creators and want to support them and not rush them, but at the same time you want the next chapter, the next part to come out. You want to know what happens.

You take a deep breath, drawing yourself out of the imaginary world and try to listen to the conversation taking place. Your sister is talking to your grandmother. Something about sports. Your head hurts. Your little brother is talking as loud as possible, trying to part of the conversation. He might be the reason for your headache, or it could be the fact that your in the backseat of the car. You have no idea why the front seat doesn’t affect you as much, but it doesn't, so it’s better. Yet there you are. Sitting in the backseat. Feeling sick.

Thats the real reason you got off your phone, you had gotten sick in the past from reading in the car. Your gaze falls to your sister and you give a weak smile, a fake one. One all to easy to make. You know she might see through it, but the fact that your faking it tells her you’d rather not talk about it. You’re so tired. She smiled back and begins to sway and slightly jump in her seat to the beat of whatever song is stuck in her head. You can’t help but give a small exhale that was considered your small laugh.

The car ride was long, but you eventually arrived home. You walk into the house and a lovely smell surrounds you. You know it immediately; butterscotch cinnamon pie. The kind your mother makes often. You walk into the kitchen with high hopes. When you click on the light, the kitchen is empty and the smell is gone.

That’s right, your mom is gone for the weekend. That’s why you were with your grandma. Your mom doesn’t even like to cook, let alone bake. What were you thinking? 

You walk up the stairs to your room and start to pack a your bag for school tomorrow. The one folder and notebook you need for chemistry fit in with little problem, you also pack the laptop the school provided. You don’t really need it, but sometimes chemistry asks for it. You then pack your music for orchestra. Content, you set the bag to the floor and put on some shorts to sleep in. 

You know the others don’t mind if you don’t say goodnight to them so you take some medicine to help you sleep and settle into bed. You’re just tired. Sleep will help. You hope it’ll help with your headache. It doesn’t matter. That old motto you probably say to much. Yet nothing else fits. Before long you fall asleep. 

 

You hear the others moving around, so you know it’s around 6 am, maybe 7. You can’t remember. A little bit later you hear your sisters alarm go off through them wall, you look down at your watch. 7:30 am. You twist and turn in bed, trying to go back to sleep for the few minutes you have left. After what felt like 30 minutes you check your watch again.  
7:46 am.  
Of course.

Realizing you probably won’t be able to fall back asleep, you push yourself up and start your morning routine. Once finished in the bathroom, you find yourself in front of your dresser, thinking about what to wear. You’re just tired. You want to fall back asleep, but you know that would get you nowhere. 

“You could skip today.” A voice echoes through your head. You can’t help but smile, “You know I can’t do that Chara.” As if that summoned them, the apparition appeared next to you. Their brown hair and rosey cheeks are a comforting sight. They smiled at you, a real smile, one you wish you could make. 

“I could take over for you,” They offer, “just for today.”  
“Possession?” you almost laugh, “Sorry. Not happening.”

They other doesn’t seem offended by your words at all, giving a sympathetic smile. “After all,” you continue, “wouldn’t they be more concerned if I went back to normal so fast?” Chara laughed, it was a nice sound to hear. They mumbled a response along the lines of ‘you got me there’ before disappearing. Leaving you alone to your thoughts.

“Are you ready up there?” A voice came from the stairs, you answered. You were almost ready. You slip on a shirt and grab a jacket off the ground. It’s hot outside, it was nearly summer after all, but you liked to have it. For comfort. After finishing up you open your door to another familiar face. 

A blue jacket and lazy grin, you rarely saw him without them. “heya kid.” Was his from of greeting. Your smile feels a little less forced with him. “ya ready for school?” You nod, grabbing your school bag from the ground. You watch as he descends the stairs. You hesitate, if only for a moment, then follow suit.

Walking past the living room and the parental figure sitting their, you make your way to the kitchen. You take a few quick gulps of a morning drink, a replacement to eating breakfast, and realized you should probably drink some water. You can’t recall the last time you had drank some.

A different realization dawns on you. Did that really just happen? You had just saw Sans. Had talked to him. Chara too. How was that even possible? They were from the game Undertale. You weren’t. In a hushed voice you call, “Chara?”  
Nothing happened.  
Of course nothing happened.  
What were you expecting?

Maybe you had be reading too many Undertale fanfictions, fan comics, or maybe just immersed yourself too far into the fandom. Could you really be blamed through? The people in the fandom were really nice as far as you have seen. They make really cool things. And even though you joined the fandom a little late, you had skipped it when the game first came out. You enjoyed it alot, it and it’s sequel Deltarune.

But what you loved most WAS the fandom. The amount of thought, love, and care the people had put into such a simple game. You almost envied them. Yes, you have creativity. And yes, you had added a few contributions if in small ways of fanart and some story drafts. But you lacked something they all had.

Motivation. You had lost motivation to do much of anything since you had moved. Maybe even a bit before that. They all had it, or maybe the didn’t and they just faked it better. EIther way, you appreciated it. It gave you something to look forward too.

You walked back out and saw your grandma sitting, waiting for your sister to come down so she could take the two of you to school. When your sister came down you could help but be reminded of all the differences between the two of you. You both looked alike, despite having no shared blood. She was your step-sister. You forget that fact sometimes. None of your blood is around right now. Not since you had moved. Your mother being the only exception. Your blood father was miles away, in another town, another area. So was your other siblings. They weren’t full sibling, having a different dad than you, then each other, but you all shared your mother's blood. 

You miss them. You wish you could have gone with your mother to see them, to see your elder sister graduate. But you had to stay here, with your step family. You had to finish school for some reason. It didn't matter. Your mom and step-dad would be home tomorrow.

 

The ride to school was quiet, as it often was. Your sister wasn’t a morning person and kept to herself. And you found no reason to talk, though you were glad you got the front seat.

You walk into orchestra a got set up. The class itself was boring, but you found yourself smiling while talking to some friends. During a short break you check your phone, the lock screen was of you and a few friends. You had a text from Sans, all in lowercase. 

don’t forget about that i’ll be there to get you from school kid. tori would kill me if you tired to walk home. again.

You laugh a bit and reply.

Ok. See you soon!

The mention of your mother made you smile, though you are glad your a little older than the grade she teaches. You love her, but you are already under her watchful eye enough.

 

The school day seemed to end rather quickly, and you walked outside to see Sans. He is wearing the space themed shoes you had bought him after arriving on the surface. You wave goodbye to one of your friends as they rush to their parent. It never ceases to amaze you how skilled they are despite not having and arms or hands. 

“Hiya Sans!” You greet him with a hug. The softness of his jacket always gave you comfort. He runs his mitten covered hand through your hair. 

“hiya kid, ya ready?”

You nod, and extend your hand. Without and words, he wraps his own around it. Even with the mitten on you can slightly feel the bones underneath. Once a bit of distance from the school you start of a conversation. “Aren’t you hot? With all that stuff on?”

His reply was a low chuckle, “ya know most things go right through me.”

You used your open hand to smother your giggle. 

“it’s also a comfort thing.” He gave a lazy wink. You stare into is deep sockets, the bags under them seem deeper.

“You should probably get some help if some things bothering you.”

“same can be said to you kiddo.”

The rest of the walk was quiet, when you reached the house it was empty. Everyone else was doing something. Sans makes his way to the couch and pats the empty space next to him. “come on kid. i know you’re tired.”

This made your eyes slightly water, but you bit back the tears and sat next to him.

 

“You see?” It was your chemistry teacher speaking. 

Since when were you in chemistry? 

The memory comes back to you. After finishing up in orchestra you went to chemistry, where the teacher promptly began teaching. Your notebook is open in front of you, a few notes from the lesson scribbled down. A lot of doodles lined the edges. 

“Did you understand anything?” Your friend to leans over and asks. You shake you head. “No I wasn’t really paying attention. You both laugh a bit and you begin to think. 

What was wrong with you? One time is weird, but two times? Within the same day? 

In the past you imagined yourself in the world of Undertale. But that was just your imagination. Whatever just happened. Whatever that was. That felt real. But it couldn’t be. Right?

You shake your head and the bell rings, releasing you to lunch. You begin remember how weird it was when you first lived to this area. 4 classes a day, and different classes in each semester. Coming from a school that had 8 classes a day and 4 of which were all year classes. 

You grab some school food and sit down at the table you always say at. You only knew two people who sat with you, but the rest knew that were you sat was your seat. Your friend didn’t try to make conversation with you or drag you into whatever the rest we’re talking about. If the two of you were closer you may have been slightly hurt, but the kind of friendship the two of you shared was more of a ‘I know you but wouldn’t do much with you’. It doesn’t bother you since it’s mutual. 

After a boring lunch you head to a special class that’s the length of two normal classes. It’s focus is a job that was similar to what you might want to do when you were older, if you grew older. You didn’t care much for it. You enjoy it, but you wouldn’t want to do it for your whole life. Some more of your friends are in this class. You smile at them and engage in conversation as the day goes on. They help pass the class. Before long the bell rang. 

You walked out your grandma’s car and await your sister. Your grandma asked how and your sisters day went. You both answer vaguely. It’s not long before you arrive home. Without much words you walk upstairs to your room and close yourself in. You set yourself down in front of the computer you received for your birthday. You open up a document and begin to write down the weird things you’ve been seeing.

Before long you’ve typed three paragraphs. You hear a knock on your door. “Who’s there?” You call.

“Etch.”

“Etch who?”

“Bless you, my child.”

You both laugh a bit as she pushed open the door.She makes her way around the bit of a mess that is your room and stands behind your chair. You don’t turn to face her, only seeing the reflection of you both on the screen of the computer. She wraps her big arms around your shoulders, gently hugging you. “How are you doing my child?” The goat like monster asks you. You answer they way you always do, shrugging it off and saying you’re fine. “tori, you’re going to miss the show.” A voice calls, it’s not loud but it reached the two of you regardless. “Will you not join us?” Toriel lets go of your shoulders and you turn to face her. “No, I think I’ll skip this time and finish this up,” You gesture to the computer.. She nods with a sad smile and wishes you well, you do the same to her. 

Turning back to your computer screen you see an empty water bottle,. Remembering you what you told yourself this morning about drinking more water, you grab the bottle and walk down stairs to the kitchen. Reaching the bottom of the stairs the others in the living room acknowledge your presence. 

“SO YOU DECIDED TO JOIN US AFTER ALL HUMAN?” The younger skeletons voice boomed. The fish monster on his left promptly shushed him, attention still partly on the TV. You shake your head with a smile. You tell them you’re just getting water, holding up the empty bottle for emphasis. “Make sure not to spend too much time in front of a screen.” You mother gently tells you, “Yes, the outside had its charms too.” The other goat monster agrees. 

You tell them you only need to finish then maybe you’ll take a walk outside. They accept that answer for now and you finish getting your water you make your way back to your room. The TV is loud but you hear a voice speak over the noise. “Last chance.” Your sister tells you. She is sprawled out on the couch, your grandmother and little brother are seated close to each other on the other side. 

You shake your head again a walk back up stairs, knowing you have a bit more to add to your list of weird things. 

 

Once you write everything you can think of you try to listen for any noise. The TV is still loud downstairs. You take a deep breath and walk down the stairs and out the doors, not wanting to see who was seated in the living room. Outside is warm, not too hot though. You walk around the big house, and gaze into the dense amount of trees surrounding it.You find a small bench a bit away and out of view of the house. Two touches sit on boths side of the bench, waiting to be lit. You take a seat and relax a bit. 

“So do you know what's going on or do I need to explain idiot.” A voice growled.

You let out a small laugh leaning your head back, tears slightly begin to fill your eyes. “I have an idea but,”

“You don’t want it to be the truth. You’re a twisted idiot.” He growled again. You looked down a lock with the soulless eyes of the golden flower. “You act like I don’t already say that to myself often.” 

Flowey lets out a growl, “That’s why you're an Idiot.’ With that said he borrows back into the ground. You sit out in the diming lit a bit longer, breathing in the nature air. Signing to yourself you mumble, “I really am an idiot.”

 

After a while you go back to the house and go to bed. The morning is the same routine as the day before, as it always is. You meet your sister down stairs and you both head to school. You grandma reminds you that your parents will be home tonight. Mixed feelings come with that. The first two classes pass with nothing interesting, On your way to lunch to see Sans sitting in the courtyard, talking to Monster Kid. You walk up to them, a smile on your face. “Yo dude!” MK greets. You conversate with him for a bit before he runs off. You turn to Sans. His Lazy grin seems strained. “you willing to talk kid?” he asks.

“If your willing to listen.”

 

You both walk over to a more secluded part of the area and take a seat. “what’s going on.” He asked, more sympathy in his voice than you’ve hear in a long while.

“I’m not sure, I’m just sad.”

“do you know why?”

You shake your head.

He lets out a hum, “then start with something easier. why would you fall into the underground?”

You take a moment to think. “I was sad, we had just moved here. I moved away from my family. I still have mom but, after so many years having them all so close.” Tears begin to fall. “I just wanted to give up, not exist. It’d be easier than this…” Your words come out fast and your voice is uneven, “I know how easy it is to end it, I see the options everywhere……” Here it came, what circled in your mind way to often. “But I’m a coward!!! I’m not even brave enough to kill myself and end it!!” You nearly screamed the words. 

Before Sans can speak you keep going, “I know people would miss me!! I know they’d be sad!! I don’t want that!! But…. but….. b-ut…. I-i know they’d, they’d move on….. Like….. Like they did when I-i moved away…..” tears still stream down your face. Your breath is still uneven, but is somehow it is better now than while you were speaking. Arms wrap around you.

You continue to cry into the arms surrounding you.

“a coward or not, does it matter? those around you are happy you are around, they want you to stay. everything you said is true in some ways. after a while everyone would move on if you left. but you know they would do anything to keep you around. so talk to us, to them. they want to help.” Sans runs his hand over your head. 

“HE'S RIGHT HUMAN! A LOT OF PEOPLE WILL DO ANYTHING TO HELP YOU!” Papyrus picked you up and hugged you tightly, before setting you in front of another. 

“A lot of people struggle, you want to help them. You just need to let them do the same for you.” Asgore bright eyes seemed to light up and he patted your head. 

“And if they don’t want to help you don’t bother with them!!!” Undyne gave you a thumbs up. 

“A-as long as y-you help others a-and let people h-help you, you can keep going and be truly happy. Alphys told you, finishing with no stutter at all. 

“My child.” You look towards the last of your monster family, “don’t give up on your world quite yet. If you can’t find your own hopes and dreams, try to help someone else, maybe you’ll find yours along the way.” Toriel gave you a hug, a motherly hug. 

Sans stepped forward again. “i know your a bright kid, and wanted someone to talk to… but i’d recommend letting the imaginary stay that way. don’t want to lose yourself.” He added a lazy wink.

You nod and begin to thank everyone. 

 

You open your eyes to your phone playing a video, an Undertale comic dub. You move to get up and head downstairs. You find your sister to recap the day. She laughs and tells you after school you both rode home then you had gone upstairs and had fallen asleep. You can now remember, after eating lunch as normal, you went to class like normal. Then you came home. A slept. A dream. Seemed like twisted fate. You chat with your sister for a while.

You parents walk in and while your sister talks to her father, you follow your mother as she heads to her room. You hear her talk about her trips and the plan to send you to the family for the summer. 

Your mother lays on her bed, clearly exhausted. You climb on the bed and rest your head on her chest, she puts an arm around you. “You ok sweetie?”

You move to press you head further into her,

“yeah. I’m ok”

**Author's Note:**

> I did my best to give the reader as much freedom as possible. They can be male, female, neither, both. They can be going into any career, have any type of friends. Basically I tried to make the main character as open to interpretation as possible so the reader can put themselves into the story. I Hope you liked it, or at least found some good in it.


End file.
